popular :)

oh man! i just found 2 sites that has the first, then the other, second season for this tv show that used to air on family channel called popular! :) i LOVEEEE this show! it's soo funny and random but it's crazy old! it was like 1999? haha. i just wanted to post it up here so i can always come back if i ever lose the site :P

season 1: http://vandelatex.com/pop/1/
season 2: http://vandelatex.com/pop/2/

too bad they stopped on the second season.. it was pretty good. i was looking forward for more :(.

how to install LOVE.

Tech Support: Hello … how can I help you?

Customer: Well, after much consideration, I’ve decided to installLove. Can you guide me through the process?

Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?

Customer: Well, I’m not very technical, but I think I’m ready. What do I do first? Tech Support: The first step is to open your Heart. Have youlocated your Heart? Customer: Yes, but there are several other programs running now.Is it okay to install Love while they are running? Tech

Support: What programs are running ?

Customer: Let’s see, I have Past Hurt, Low Self-Esteem, Grudgeand Resentment running right now.

Tech Support: No problem, Love will gradually erase Past Hurtfrom your current operating system. It may remain in your permanentmemory but it will no longer disrupt other programs. Love willeventually override Low Self-Esteem with a module of its own called HighSelf-Esteem. However, you have to completely turn off Grudge andResentment. Those programs prevent Love from being properly installed.Can you turn those off ?

Customer: I don’t know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

Tech Support: With pleasure. Go to your start menu and invokeForgiveness. Do this as many times as necessary until Grudge andResentment have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, done! Love has started installing itself. Is thatnormal?

Tech Support: Yes, but remember that you have only the baseprogram. You need to begin connecting to other Hearts in order to getthe upgrades.

Customer: Oops! I have an error message already. It says, “Error- Program not run on external components.” What should I do?

Tech Support: Don’t worry. It means that the Love program is setup to run on Internal Hearts, but has not yet been run on your Heart. Innon-technical terms, it simply means you have to Love yourself beforeyou can Love others.

Customer: So, what should I do?

Tech Support: Pull down Self-Acceptance; then click on thefollowing files: Forgive-Self; Realize Your Worth; and Acknowledge yourLimitations.

Customer: Okay, done.

Tech Support: Now, copy them to the “My Heart” directory. Thesystem will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching faultyprogramming. Also, you need to delete Verbose Self-Criticism from alldirectories and empty your Recycle Bin to make sure it is completelygone and never comes back.

Customer: Got it. Hey! My heart is filling up with new files.Smile is playing on my monitor and Peace and Contentment are copyingthemselves all over My Heart. Is this normal?

Tech Support: Sometimes. For others it takes awhile, buteventually everything gets it at the proper time. So Love is installedand running. One more thing before we hang up. Love is Freeware. Be sureto give it and its various modules to everyone you meet. They will inturn share it with others and return some cool modules back to you.

Customer: Thank you, God.

strange dream last night.

So i had a dream last night and it was about Kate from Jon and Kate + Eight.
and this other dream that had to do with me climbing up these unstable stairs to get to someone's wedding
and chris bosh was there. LOL and we took a bunch of pictures.

but first let's talk about the Kate dream.
so kate randomly went back to work as a nurse and she went to go help this woman who was exposed to this oxygen thing that burns your skin off so kate had to wear this huge suit that covers up like majority of her body and she had to wear this mask. she ended up going into this room where the woman was and then her face ended up burning/started wrinkling up randomly and then she ran out screaming. her face was soo freaky looking.
then it randomly does this flashback showing how she wore the wrong mask, those normal surgical masks, and she was supposed to use this other mask called the N95 mask.
then randomly jon comes to the hospital all worried and all and he was sortof crying hugging kate because she got infected and stuff. and they got closer because he didn't realize what he would have done if she was gone.
then my dream said how "tragadies bring families closer together". and i was like damn <3. what a strange dream.

then my other dream was about
mr. chris bosh
so randomly there was this unstable staircase that was I DON'T KNOW HOW HIGH but it was your path to go to this wedding thing. i dont' know but chris bosh was there and the groom who was like MAJORLY tall. lol
well people were trying to go across but could never go half way because the staircase was always too wobbly/moving so people would get too scared to go across. so i tried myself but i got scared too so i ended up going down and then the groom randomly helped me down by carrying me down. and when i stood in front of him, i literally went up to his stomach. 8| he was soo tall! ahha. well then i was like, hey, lets take pictures together, so it was me bosh and the groom randomly taking pictures of how short i was compared to them. hahaha. it was funny. and random again. lol


and yeah that's pretty much it.

i remember i had all these other random dreams,
one with orlando bloom where i think i won a date with him and we went to the mall.
LOL but at first it was like, we went to a party and there was these group of people randomly sitting in a circle, and then i was standing beside one of them and i grabbed their hair and pulled it back to see their face, it was elijah wood and i was like "YOU'RE NOT ORLANDO BLOOM". then i dont' remember how i got to go out with orlando bloom but i did and i had a good time. LOL

another dream was with jose calderon. LOL it was too funny, but i'll post that one up later when im more in the mood.
im tired so im gonna take a nap.

uh oh.

lol, well i think im feeling better now.
i need to try to be more optimistic/happy
SOOO i had a lot of icecream today.
haha. a couple of days ago i did 20 situps, 20 pushups, 45 seconds of that sitting down with no chair and your back is against the wall thing, and 20 jumping jacks.
i think the exercise was a bad idea cuz now my jaw bone near my ears are hurting ALOT.
+ a couple of days, a week or 2 ago i sortof tried to eat my baby brothers snack which tastes AMAZINGLY DELICIOUS,
and i ended up snapping this elastic that's holding my teeth together.
i have 2 on each side of my mouth. the side that had one, well LOL that one just snapped a couple min ago cuz i was eating strawberry cheesecake icecream and bread and there was a chunk of cheese cake i was trying to bite on.

i swear i think im gonna get my ass kicked by my surgeon :(

hopefully i won't get into that much trouble.

you're trapped, and there's nothing you can do about it, but wait.

So it's been... about 2 and a half weeks since my surgery,
i've had blended up mcdonalds, soup, rice
boost, arizona, gaterade...
pretty much anything i can blend/make sure it tasted good at least to eat.
it's not even eating to be honest, it's like drinking all your meals. (that's if there's anything there to blend)

what do i have to go through?
well it's like you're stuck behind this swollen up skin surrounding your face,
unable to take it off, unable to do anything about it but to keep it on and wait for time to pass and wait for it to heal on it's own.
you're disguised as this ugly thing (And trust me, if half your face was swollen, i don't think you'll think you look too hot either).

what else?
my bottom lip and chin are still numb. from time to time its fun to poke at, it feels like playdoh.
after eating things, sometimes when you stand in front of the mirror you might find your milkshake or chunks of jello on your chin and you didn't even know!
oh yeah, and in the beginning, everytime you'd laugh, it feels like your mouth skin is stretching from left to right.
right now the pain isn't that bad but i can still feel the hooks they attached to my brackets slice chunks of my lip skin everytime i smile/laugh. honestly, i piece of my skin is like hanging there.
oh yeah, and i have this other thing attached to my upper teeth, this platform looking thing that i bite on.
and there's these elastics that are holding my jaws together so i don't open my mouth to wide or my stitches'll come out.
they're already coming out. i can feel it. it's funny touching them with my tongue.
they run along the bottom part of my lower jaw, up onto my inner cheek skin and then to my upper back jaw part.

it sucks to be honest. not being able to eat, go out, have people over for a couple weeks.
well i can have people over but everyone has work and school going on.
staying home all day, everyday, doing the same routine, eating the same food, not being able to do anything....
it's annoying + frustrating.

what would you do if you had to go through that.

well, i know time will heal everything but i just really wish that time will go so much faster....

i need a new book to read :( i tried reading the hobbit again, but i've read it already.
i've read the last 2 harry potter books too.

i want twilight. LOL. the movie sucked, no effence to anyone who liked it.
i just think the "OMFG<3<3<3" love scenes, romantic parts were captured int he movie as well as it was explained in the book (as i've heared from the 54604643540640 girls + 1 guy who talk about it)

*sigh*. it took someone 1 + 1/2 months (6 weeks) for their swelling to go down (someone who actually had jaw surgery before)
2&1/2 weeks of 6-8. :(

is it too soon to regret?

well, i just had jaw surgery a week ago.
today zaid came over and he wanted to see the pictures my dad took when he came and visited me at the hopsital. i took a couple pictures the day before my surgery with melanie and monica where we hanged out at markville for the day and then went over to my house.

as i was flipping through the pictures, i was staring at my old face.
i really miss it. maybe it's because my face is all swollen up and i think my nose looks weird.
it probably does because when they did the surgery they shifted my upper jaw a bit forward and my bottom jaw a bit back so it can balance out HENCE the nose probably came out a bit.
i swear, my nose was like a button and the bridge, there isn't any, so i think my nose will look even more flat or disproportionate.

not only i'm afraid of my nose, i'm afraid i won't like my new face.
i don't know if my nose is swollen or it's the size it's supposed to be right now. D:
i'm sortof freaking out or a tad regretting on having the surgery.
right before my surgery my surgeon showed me these "estimated" sideprofile picture of me of how my face'll look like after the surgery. when i saw it i shit you not i didn't really like it, either it was because im really used to seeing my underbite or i thought it was weird :(
i don't know what to do. well the only thing i can do is wait til the healing is gone and DEAL WITH IT.

i've lived with an underbite 18 years of my life. i can't do anything about it now but rock the face i've decided to have.

the benefits of having the jawsurgery, I CAN FINALLY EAT PROPERLY.
hopefully my dimples aren't gone. if so. sad for life! :(

i should stop whining. i would go smile instead but again, i CAN'T or it'll hurt :(

boo recovery. i'll blog about my recovery after.

later days.



THE NEXT DAY,

soooo, i went to my surgeon today in the morning for a check up.
my face is just all swollen. he told me to stop looking at my face and thinking this is how it'll look like,
i have to wait for the 6th week and compare it to now cuz that's the HUGE difference.
i can't wait. i dont' want to look like a plumpkin anymore :(

and if my nose ends up looking like the way it does, after he said it's not...

somebody's going to get a hurt REAL bad.

reassurance can make wonders:)